Lullaby
by Handwritten
Summary: HIATUS. Two musical students competing for one thing; though for completely different reasons. He never expected how much could change in only a year. He may have to choose - his violin, or the violinist. Namine/Roxas
1. Prologue

**Lullaby  
**_Prologue - The Third Year_

* * *

Roxas Sasaki was the best violinist in Twilight Music Academy. For his entire first _and _second year, he had been the concertmaster - first chair, first violin. That was a feat in all it's own; after all, the Academy was full of some of the most musically talented students between the young age of fifteen (unlikely, but if they were really talented, it wasn't unheard of) to eighteen. His seventeenth birthday had come and gone, and he was looking forward to completing his last year at the Academy.

...Well, he _used _to be ranked first in violin. But the cat was out of the bag - Roxas had been bumped down for his third and final year. It was printed, black and white. He had to admit that it was a bit unnerving not seeing his familiar name at the top of the page. It always had been, until now.

To some people's surprise, in first chair, first violin, was Namine Tanaka.

Roxas was receiving quite a few sympathetic pats on the shoulder by a few of the older students, and pitying glances from the younger. Mixed in, there were more then a couple smug smiles. Roxas had expected it at the least. But we'll talk more about that later.

Other then their love for the same instrument, the similarities between the top two students ended there. Namine mostly kept to herself, no matter how hard the other students tried to draw her out. Roxas was known somewhat as the class clown; often cracking jokes to break the tension before a musical concert. So you can see as how they may never cross paths other then the usual rehearsal, or meeting with teachers.

Roxas had always been expected to once again be announced as concertmaster for his third year running. Until the concert that took place only a few short weeks ago; where something with the blond boy's performance just seemed to be _off._ Of all the days he had to get "stage fright" was the concert where their playing would be assessed for the new year's arrangement.

Though Roxas knew where he stood - he was at the top of a prestigious music academy (well, near the top). He couldn't fail now. Even knowing this, he didn't seem to be too upset about being moved down to second place. No one except him knew the _real _reason he took to the demotion so graciously. Call him stupid and naive all you want.

Getting back to Namine and Roxas. Of course, there was the few minor characteristics they shared - they were both blond, and had blue eyes. But hers had a milky far-away look to them, whereas Roxas' were darker and full of youthful mischief. His presence was always hovering in front of you; usually smiling at his own private joke, or laughing with a few of his friends. While Namine's very being just...sort of floated in the corner. Like in the blink of an eye, she could be gone.

Roxas had been practicing the violin ever since the age of five. But he had never touched an instrument other then this particular one - for some reason, it would sting in his heart like some sort of betrayal. He wasn't even sure if it was his imagination; but the way his fingers twitched excitedly whenever he thought about picking up his violin was proof enough he was rather obsessive.

But he kept those sort of thoughts to himself. He didn't mind the 'clown' status - but being the joke of the class was something he could do without. Most of the students played at least two or three instruments, to get a better grip on their musical career. But Roxas had no interest in the cello, or trumpet. He had never strummed the strings of a guitar. Even the thought of playing piano put his mind to sleep.

Now, Namine played a fair number of things. The violin (natch), piano, the harp, the Irish flute...even the viola, as if the violin wasn't enough. She had private vocal lessons every week, and was always signed up for any extra available lessons. Roxas never spotted her at the occasional party in the dorms - word was, she rarely left her room outside class. Namine was always rehearsing - or so her roommate said.

_Though I would probably practice all the time as well, if I had that many instruments to play._

One other thing about Roxas - he had no filter between his brain and his mouth. So, of course, he had unintentionally hurt a few girl's feelings when they attempted to confess to him. He was never rational. He never thought ahead, or made sure the results of his decisions wouldn't be hurting others. _When in doubt, improvise. _

Namine never let herself go somewhere unprepared - and her manner was always calm. Roxas dutifully admired that trait of hers, as he could never keep still. Even when they were performing for all the parents, his heel could be seen tapping away against a chair. Often on completely the wrong beat, which made sitting near him rather hard when rehearsing.

Time for fate to put in _his_ two cents.

_Wouldn't they make the perfect couple?_

* * *

This is a story I wrote agesss ago, but took off the site to rewrite. Since the other story I've been working on seems to be slowly dying in my documents, I decided to put it back up. ;) I know it's completely AU, and isn't *quite* up to my other stories' standards...but we all have guilty pleasures!  
Btw, I know NOTHING about violin arrangements. So I've been bugging my friend about all the little details xD Sorry for any miscalculations in this ;D

I'll add the first chapter next week.  
**Review?**


	2. Musical Mix Up

**Lullaby  
_Musical Mix-Up_**

* * *

"What the hell does fate have _in_ for me?" Roxas sighed mournfully, looking down at his copy of the concert arrangement. One of the songs that had been chosen..._he_ would be doing the solo. Not just any solo -- but a solo that overrode the other instruments for a good chunk of it. That was a _huge_ deal for a concert where hundreds of people from came from all over just to watch. After all, they were all 'gifted students' there at Twilight Academy. Well. Maybe not _hundreds_, since this was only for the Christmas recital.

"Why am _I _doing the solo?!" Roxas cried, frowning down at the paper; the words blurred as his thoughts raced ahead.

He was usually fine with crowds. No anxious butterflies. No nervous twitching, or cold sweat. And he sure wasn't nervous now. Just plain _confused _-- which was almost worse, in a way. Namine was officially the concertmaster (mistress?); so why on earth would the solo be given to him? _Roxas_ of all people. _Roxas_, the one who messed up in the concert that should have mattered the most to him. He understood that he was next in line, but unless Namine was planning on breaking a wrist anytime soon, there was no reason for him to do it.

He had seen Namine only an hour ago, in one of his classes. At first, he had been worried if the air would be awkward between them ever since they switched their standing positions in the lineup. But, they had acted just the same as they usually do. Completely ignored the other. (Not in a malicious way -- it would probably be more awkward if he _did_ strike of a conversation.)

_**-"It won't only be your true position you'll be losing."-**_

Roxas saw the images like they happened yesterday. His tutor, sighing with disappointment when the results came out. The other students gazing over at him with either shock or triumph -- and the rare flash of pity. They all flickered before his vision. The way his mother had hugged him tightly, while his father patted his shoulder with a weak smile. His family. _Man. _They had sacrificed so much for him, and after all they done to support him... he blew it.

A thin layer of sweat made his hairline sticky. "Why...? Argh." He groaned, pushing away painful memories as he looked to his friend for support.

"Just go see Vexen if you're worried about it." Hayner muttered. "He doesn't want the concert messed up just as much as you."

The honey-brown haired boy had been Roxas' roommate for as long as they both had been at the academy. His friend was brash and rude, but could handle the trombone better then anyone in the entire place. At the moment, he was raking his fingers through his hair, grumbling as he glared at his reflection. Roxas smirked.

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't break the glass with that evil-eye."

Hayner spun to face Roxas, holding his hands out by his sides, and ignored the blond's jibe. "Why is it you always seem to talk to me - if you have a _problem_?" At Roxas' blank expression, he sighed and shoved past him and threw open the door. "I'll be back later." After a final wave, his footsteps swiftly grew quieter as Hayner disappeared down the hallway.

It wasn't that hard to figure out where Hayner was going -- he had been sneaking out of the dorms to meet with Olette (a cute brunette from flute). It wasn't that relationships weren't forbidden or anything (that would probably create more couples then disband) - they were just frowned upon. Heavily. Most people figured that in such a prestigious school, the more trivial things like romance shouldn't distract the students.

And Roxas heartily agreed with them. Feelings just made competition more difficult. It was hard enough telling someone their playing was too flat, _without _worrying that they may not like you for it.

Roxas looked back down to the paper in his hands, the sense of dread returning. If worst came to worst, he would flat-out refuse to do it.

But, first, he would go see that ass of a teacher.

* * *

Roxas was tugging on his jacket as his footsteps echoed throughout the empty hallway. Not many people were around the south wing of the academy, now that the majority of the classes had ended for the day. Once in a while, Roxas would pass by a classroom where a private lesson was being held, and his trained ears would catch little bits of finely tuned instruments.

The school was nicer then most. Tuition was pretty expensive yearly -- and you could see that kind of money reflecting on the general feel of it. The walls and floors were paneled wood, but the yellow glow coming from the lights made it almost cozy. Large windows here and there overlooked several courtyards where students lounged daily between classes.

Finally, at one of the last classrooms in the wing, Roxas slowed. He was chewing his lip, trying to fight down his anxiety as he craned his neck forward to the small window looking into the music room.

He caught a glimpse of the back of his teacher - Mr. Vexen - but didn't pause to peer in further before gripping the handle, paper with the concert arrangement clutched in his other hand's fingers. Roxas opened the door without hesitation, but his feet skidded to a stop when he realized there was another person in the room. Of course, that 'person' was Namine. Only_ she_ of all people would have a private lesson_ directly_ after class_._ (1)

He stood stock-still for a few moments, holding his breath. It was incredibly rude to interrupt a private session (at least she hadn't been playing when he burst in, or he would _really _be in trouble.) Mr. Vexen stared at Roxas disdainfully, his thin lips twisted into a wry sort of smile.

Namine had finally noticed his presence, and followed her teacher's gaze to look over her shoulder at Roxas. Her expression was blank; blue eyes watching him with blatant disinterest, and Roxas smiled nervously. This was pretty normal between them -- Namine acting like he didn't exist, and he acknowledging her in a _'I-see-you-but-I-don't' _sort of way.

"Oh, uh...sorry, I-I didn't realize-"

"Don't worry about it." Mr. Vexen said curtly, turning back to his other student. "We were almost done. Continue, Namine."

Roxas moved back to lean against the wall after a moments' hesitation; and Namine lifted the violin back up to rest on her shoulder. Her fingers automatically shifted into the correct position on the bow, and it's sleek hairs hovered over the strings before sliding across them gracefully. Roxas' breath caught in his throat. He recognized the song instantly - it was the song that had been chosen for the concert -- the one he would be playing the solo in, if he didn't convince Mr. Vexen otherwise.

And..._ damn. _The _way _she played it. It was like she had been born knowing -- her fingers showed no effort as they flew up and down the fingerboard. Roxas forced himself to swallow. In his head, Roxas knew that Namine had always been the better player out of the two of them. There wasn't any doubt about it; she just hadn't taken that extra step that Roxas had. She threw herself into the song _just as much _as he did -- but she didn't participate in as many concerts. Since she had spent so much time working on her other instruments and talents, that had allowed Roxas to snag every violin engagement around the school. That earned him experience...more people knowing about his talents.

Namine was far more fluid and consistent in her playing, but just wasn't as well known. It wasn't only talent that got you through to the top; you had to have some sort of relationship with the teachers and students. Getting nominated wasn't easy, but Roxas had his mother's air of charisma, and his father's stubborn attitude.

When Namine finished playing the last note, Roxas shook his head numbly. She completely deserved the solo. He had no reason to feel bitter about it. Mr. Vexen seemed to be overly satisfied with Namine's playing; and gave her a approving nod. Her bow arm relaxed at her side, and the silence was even more pressing.

"Superb, Namine. I think that will be enough for today." Mr. Vexen had never used that tone with Roxas -- and the blond boy watched his instructor curiously.

Namine only nodded towards the man, not making a sound as she started gathering her music sheets. Roxas tried to keep his voice neutral as he approached the table where Mr. Vexen had an array of stacked papers.

"Sir?"

He briefly glanced up from his a document. "Yes. What is it, Roxas."

"I was looking over the arrangment..." Roxas lifted his hand which held the sheet of paper, sliding it onto the table. "I think there's been a mistake. Namine is first in violin - she should be playing the solo."

His teacher's voice was short. "There was no mistake, I assure you."

"Well," Roxas hesitated, fully knowing that Namine could hear them from where she was packing up her violin. "I'm not sure if it would be in your..._best interests_ for me to play first violin for next month's concert."

Mr. Vexen frowned at Roxas, setting down his pen with some formality. "And why is that?"

"Well, I have no problem with taking the second solo - it would be fairer to Nami-"

He was interrupted with a wave of a hand. "I am fully aware of what would be fair, Roxas. But Namine is the one who suggested I give the solo to you in the first place." (Roxas highly doubted that, but kept quiet.) "I believe that you will be able to play it without a problem."

It was Roxas' turn to frown, and his voice was lilting; almost taunting. "You _believe_ in me? Enough that you have Namine practicing the song before you give me the chance! I know you gave her advance notice of which song was chosen." Roxas blindly jerked his thumb towards Namine's general direction. He knew he was just being plain nasty now, using an obvious assumption and turning it into a negative thing, but he wasn't in the mood to care. "I'm not going to make a fool of myself again."

"You won't." Another curt answer. Another moment of silence. "I'll make sure you completely know the song before I let you attempt it in front of an audience, I assure you." Mr. Vexen's tone was firm, but Roxas didn't let himself lose so easily.

"No thanks. You can give the solo to someone else." He turned to walk out the door, catching Namine's eye as he walked forward. She looked nervous; her eyes unusually wide. If he had looked closer, he would see that her knees were shaking.

Roxas had the decency to pause when he teacher raised his voice. "Sasaki. Come back here." A moment of silence, then Roxas sullenly turned back towards him, only taking a few steps towards his desk. Mr. Vexen's voice returned to it's normal pitch, and he placed both hands palm-down on his desk, leaning forward.

"There is a reason I want you to play the solo. The administrator from RSM is coming to this concert-" Roxas froze. _RSM - Radiant School of Music_. "-and if you play without a hitch, I'm sure she'll rethink the scholarship."

"...And if I mess up? What then?" The question burst from his lips before he could stop himself. Mental head-smack.

His teacher pressed his lips together. "I won't let that happen. There is a reason Namine was practicing that song just now...she has agreed to help you with any rough spots you may have. To help you become more confident in your ability."

_**-"You can't fail again."-**_

Roxas twisted his neck to look back over at Namine, who was clutching the handle of her violin case so tightly, that her knuckles were slowly turning white. Sensing another round of indecision, Mr. Vexen goaded him further.

"At least give it a try, Sasaki. The Christmas recital isn't until December. You can give it a try then, for the students. That will prepare you for the larger concert in January -- _don't _interrupt me," He added, as Roxas opened his mouth. "-you won't be the only student with a solo. You shouldn't let your weaknesses restrain you."

Roxas thought it over for about two and a half seconds before raising his chin. "Fine. I'll give it a try - two weeks. If it doesn't work out, you give it to someone else."

'_He has a lack of boundaries_' - that was the only thing Namine could think about him as Roxas negotiated with the teacher.

"Fine, fine." The teacher thought for a moment. "Every day from four to six, for two weeks. You can use the spare music room upstairs, so you won't have any disturbances. I'll tell your teachers, so they know what you're doing."

"...Every day?" Roxas groaned, giving his teacher a pleading look. He saw all his weekends jump out the window, hitting the grass below with a sickening crunch.

"You're only doing it for two weeks." Mr. Vexen gave a smile that, for some reason, made Roxas gulp nervously. "So you may as well get in as much practice as you possibly can. You can start tomorrow -- good day, you two. I'm going to go get a cup of coffee."

Before Roxas could even open his mouth to speak, his infuriatingly cunning teacher swept himself out the doorway, leaving a very awkward silence in his wake.

"So...um..." Roxas started, looking to Namine sheepishly. Her gaze was duly set on the floor, but her back was stiff as a board. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

Namine nodded shortly, and then moved her case to her other hand, and walked out of the room._ Great. Just great._ Two hours of awkward violin tutoring from a girl that he hardly knew.

_What have I gotten myself into...?_

* * *

I liked this chapter :D I'm taking the plot in a completely different direction on the rewrite, so if you read the original 'Lullaby', this one is VERY different.

**1 **- What Roxas meant by this, is that the other people he heard practicing most likely hadn't had class earlier that day, since the majority of the people there don't have the private lessons right after class.

**Note** - The bolded statements/quotes are not part of that particular scene or character. It's more of a...memory. That's all I'm saying :k (Thank you _Redeeming Endeavor_ for indirectly reminding me to add this note, haha)

**R E V I E W  
:D **


	3. Less talk, more playing!

**Lullaby  
_Less talk, more playing!_**

* * *

The day went by quicker then usual. Quite a few times, Hayner or someone was talking to him, and he didn't realize until they fell silent. He struggled to focus, as usual. So _what _if he had a private class with Namine? It wasn't the end of the world...right? Maybe it would be better having another student practicing with him -- no homework then, like with a normal tutor.

Though remembering her stiff figure, he couldn't help but wonder why she had agreed to helping him. Didn't she already have enough to work on?

But Roxas figured he should try to at least _talk _to Namine. Maybe that would make it less weird when they met up the next day. Just a quick greeting in the hallway, perhaps? Or just tell her he was looking forward to tomorrow (even though he wasn't)?

_Talk to her. Talk to her. Talk to her. Talk to her._

Even while chanting his mantra silently, Roxas didn't take_ one _step in her direction when he spotted her in one of the school's on-campus diner. His eyes skirted around her as usual, and she didn't look as if she had spotted him. A few other students mumbled hurried sentences behind his back, questioning the spaced-out expression flitting on and off his face.

"You okay, Roxas?" Hayner questioned as they sat down at one of the tables, setting their food down with a clatter. Quite a few students were milling around, but the chattering was kept down to a low buzz throughout the room. The faculty had been under a bit of pressure lately, for some reason.

_Maybe that's why Vexen got Namine to tutor me? I mean, it takes a load off his back, that's for sure..._

"Fine." Roxas muttered in reply, spinning his fork into his udon with hungry gusto. "I'll tell you when we get back."

After a jerky nod from Hayner, they lowered their heads to devour the food on their plates. If Roxas looked up, a few heads scattered throughout the room would spin back forward. Were people still wondering why he had been bumped down from first?

_Why should they even care?_

He contemplated this for a few moments. _I suppose...since I've always been there...it would only seem natural that I would end up staying there for my third year._

**_-"This is your last chance..."-_**

When he blinked, the memory faded. Ever since the beginning of the year...he'd be having these flickers of unwanted memories...

"Leave me alone." Roxas growled into his food, ferociously stabbing a square of tofu. There was a pause in the conversation around him.

"Gladly." Hayner muttered after a few beats. Someone giggled quietly, and then the silence passed. Roxas hardly noticed...he was too busy watching a certain blond heading out of the room, a plastic bag hanging at her side.

* * *

Back in their spacious dorm room (not many of the third-year students had roommates, but when they did, the room was extra large) Roxas flopped headfirst onto his bed, stomach full after a large dinner, while Hayner went to take a quick bath. Roxas fished his violin case from where it was leaning against the wall, setting it carefully on his bed. He ran his fingers along the polished wood gently.

He loved his violin. It wasn't a terribly expensive instrument (a few students had eighteenth-century instruments worth thousands -- why someone kept those on campus, he would never know) ...his was nine hundred or so. Three hundred of that came out of his own pocket. His parents had managed to give him more then half the money needed. When they had presented him with the cheque...well, it was one of the few times he could actually remember crying from plain happiness.

Hayner reentered sometime later, snapping Roxas out of his daydream. His towel was hanging around his neck (he had gotten into fresh clothes in the bathroom, except for the shirt he was now searching for) a few trails of steam trickled out from the open door.

"So...what did Vexen say earlier?" Hayner said finally.

Roxas explained as briefly and quickly as possible. It wasn't that he didn't trust Hayner; he just didn't have much interest in talking about his personal life. For some reason, his tutoring sessions with Namine felt _extremely _personal. More then it should. Was it just because she used to be second to him?

"You're kidding... Every day? Really?"

Roxas nodded, running a chunk of rosin up and down his bow's strings. Hayner watched him with one brow raised skeptically. The rosin was light in his fingers, and he stared intently at it while Hayner spoke.

"I've gotta say I'm sorta surprised you aren't a bit more...I dunno, annoyed. About the whole thing."

"Oh, I am." Roxas grinned. "But I figure it won't take Namine long to get fed up with me, and annoying Vexen is too much to resist. _'__You shouldn't let your weaknesses restrain you__'_." Roxas said mockingly, rolling his eyes. "My only weakness is my lack of priorities." Roxas was making this up on the spot. He didn't expect Hayner's interest in the situation.

"Mhm." Hayner nodded, not really understanding Roxas' last statement, but not bothering to comment on it. "So...none of this is about getting a second chance at a scholarship - just pissing off your teacher?"

"Well...the scholarship is sort of appealing, but I've never really wanted to go to Radiant." _For the wrong reasons. _ "But Vexen deserves it. I wonder what he did to Namine to make her give _me _the solo."

Hayner's smile was devilish. "Well, sounds good to me. And, as a bonus, you'll get to spend all that time with Namine. I mean, you got the hots!"

Roxas, looking up from his violin, glared warningly. "Do not."

"Do to."

"Do not."

"Do to!"

"Do not!"

Hayner smirked. "Do not!"

"Do to-!...h-hey! Wait! No fair!" Roxas shoved his violin case to the bottom of his bed, and flung his body back against the pillow. Hayner snickered, but stopped when Roxas locked eyes with him from across the room.

"Hey, Hayner?"

"...Yeah?"

Roxas absently scratched his chin. "What do you..." He rethought his words. "Well, what does Namine...you know, think of me?"

"A lazy violinist who's a complete idiot?" Hayner blinked. "Well, I can't be sure; but it's what everyone_ else_ thinks of you."

"I'm serious." Roxas protested from his spot on the bed, tossing the small box containing the rosin up into the air. He caught it easily, trying not to seem too eager for Hayner's answer. Eager, _or_ impatient.

"Heh, well, Roxas, unless you haven't noticed - Namine and I aren't exactly _tight._" Hayner held up his crossed fingers. "So how should I know? You could ask Pence. Those two eat lunch together once in a while -- or so I've seen."

"Whatever." Roxas sighed, turning over so he didn't have to see Hayner's smug smile. He peeked through his eyelashes at the clock on his bedside table. The red digital numbers read half-past seven. He didn't bother to suppress a yawn. "I'm gonna go to sleep."

"Dude! It's not even eight yet!"

"Shut it. I'm tired."

Hayner groaned. "I was about to practice, too!" Roxas could make out the sounds of Hayner unlatching the hooks on his trombone case.

"Play _one note _on that elephant trunk of yours, and I'm shoving it _straight up your ass_."

"...Damn you, Roxas."

* * *

Roxas stayed in his room most of the next day, resorting to bribery to get Hayner to bring him some food around one. That's what he did on weekends -- slept, and read. He didn't get much rest during the week (for reasons unknown. He just had a habit of becoming half-nocturnal from time to time) so he tried to catch up as much as he could when he had all that free time.

Well, he _used _to have lots of free time. _Now I have to attend to these stupid private classes with Namine._ _Four to six are prime napping hours!_

He tried to picture Namine instructing him for bowing. Correcting a faulty note? Encouraging him? He couldn't see any of it. None at all. She rarely spoke up in class, unless a teacher called on her.

_"-And, as a bonus, you'll get to spend all that time with Namine. I mean, you got the hots!"_

How in the world could he _like_ a girl he had never had a real conversation with? It was just preposterous. Not that she was unattractive (she was cute, sure) but she just never...spoke. He could scarcely recall ever hearing more then a few words coming from her lips. Her vocal answers in class were so clipped and quiet, that by the time he actually realized it was her speaking, she had finished, and was hiding her eyes beneath her choppy bangs.

Except that one time, but he hadn't even meant to.

Picking up his book, Roxas flipped to his marked spot, and dove into it's pages. It would be four soon enough -- he just needed to keep his mind as blank as possible until then...

**_-transform into something almost grotesque-_**

His eyebrows lowered, and his hands almost shook as he held back different voices trying to invade his silence. Why couldn't he just _forget? _Just...move on? Why did everything have to be so hard?

_Why couldn't she leave him alone?_

* * *

Roxas' breath was shallow as he walked the length of the second floor, south wing. His violin case kept bumping annoyingly against his leg, but the pain wasn't immediate. His blue eyes drifted over the few bulletin boards on the walls. Mostly bare, with only a couple old posters still stuck up here and there...

_I'm not late, am I?_

He pulled out his cellphone, glancing at the small pixel numbers. It was five-to. Just on time. He reached the door, pulling it open. Namine was already there, sitting on the bench of the unused piano, gazing out the window. At the noise Roxas made as he entered, the girl jumped, looking over to him with apprehensive eyes.

"Uh. Hi." Roxas stuttered, shifting his weight to the other foot. She didn't speak, but merely nodded nervously in his direction.

"..." Roxas couldn't help but sigh at the silence that followed his semi-polite greeting._ Is it that hard to say a simple 'hello' back?_

Apparently so, since Namine didn't speak a word as he approached her slowly. His palms were steadily growing damp, and he feared for his violin case which could fall from his slick fingers any second. But maybe the crashing noise of his case hitting the floor would snap him out of whatever he had sunken in to. Or wake him up from this very odd dream.

Namine's usual calm manner seemed almost...jittery. Her eyes darted from side to side, and she kept biting down on her lip for seconds at a time. She was doing better then he was, at least. Two hours - _alone_ - with her? Could he survive? Who would crack first, and run from the room screaming?

She glanced at a small table set a few feet away from the piano. Setting his case down, Roxas unzipped it swiftly, keeping his mind on the simple task as her eyes swept over the piano keys again and again. He lifted his bow and violin out of the velvet-lined mold set in the case, and set his violin on his shoulder. He didn't have to think about the movements - after all the years of playing, it was automatic - so his eyes were free to sneak a look at Namine.

Like him, she wasn't wearing the blazer of the school's uniform. They matched in their white collared shirts, though where Roxas' top two buttons weren't done, hers were.

"So what do you want me to play?" Roxas mumbled, tightening the knob at the end of his bow.

"This piece - here." She handed him a few loose sheets. The title printed across the page - 'Allegro con brio' - a piece by Beethoven, he remembered. It wasn't extremely difficult, but complicated for whoever was in first violin. Roxas hadn't played it in a while, though he liked it enough.

"Do you know it?" She asked softly. Roxas blinked. Her voice really was quite pretty - soft like the light coming from the lowering sun through the window.

"Yeah -- well, yes. I've played it before." He finally managed to answer. She regarded him for a few moments, taking in his worried expression and tightly pressed lips.

"I'll play first." She said.

_Isn't this tutoring supposed to help me learn a solo played by first violinists? _Roxas thought snidely, but didn't reply except for a short nod.

The first note coming from Namine shook Roxas out of his thoughts, and he mustered enough energy in his tired limbs to press his own bow to the string. His eyes focused on the black notes on the paper; mind slowly shutting down. The bowing was so slow at first, it felt like his arm was about to fall off. In the large room, each sound seemed to be magnified. It _did_ sound beautiful, no matter how he tried to deny it.

A series of silences were spread throughout this particular composition. It was as if Beethoven used the silence as part of his music...it created a tension that lifted the hairs on the back of Roxas' neck every time he played it. Or, didn't, since the quiet seconds seemed endless as his bow hovered mid-air.

They played together for a good two minutes, and sweat slowly gathered on Roxas' back. Namine continued with her fluid bowing, as Roxas lifted his own bow off the strings to pluck the accompaniment. It was another thing he really enjoyed about the violin -- giving his bowing arm a rest as he plucked the notes with his fingers.

After a few moments, he moved his bow back onto the strings.

Namine watched his playing steadfastly. She didn't even have to look at what she was doing, yet her fingers never missed a note. A certain calm seemed to envelop her; her wrist was relaxed, and for once, her gaze was solely directed on him. Not in his violin, or his bow..._him._

Roxas, distracted, stumbled in his playing, and a horrible screech emitted from his instrument as his bow slid down on the string on an angle. Roxas sighed, and let his arm relax against his side. Namine halted her playing as well, looking down when he spoke.

"I don't see what the point of this is. Aren't I supposed to be learning my solo? Not...just playing as your backup?"

Her voice was soft; eyes darting back to her own sheet music. "You're having trouble because you haven't learned how to follow."

"I know how to follow along as good as anyone!" Roxas blustered, unclenching his hand around his bow. "When I-"

"Playing a series of notes at the same time as someone else is not accompanying."

"...Ne?" He muttered, mostly out of confusion.

_That doesn't make sense! Then what exactly is the definition of 'accompany'?_

He must have been thinking out loud, because Namine nodded, looking over at her music sheets. "You see, before you can learn to lead, you need to learn how to follow. Roxas..." Her voice grew hesitant. "You've been at the top for so long, I think you've forgotten how to follow."

Roxas, for the first time since entering the room, grinned almost childishly. "You think?"

Only one side of her mouth twitched, as if she was fighting back a smile of her own. "It's what I've gathered."

"How long have you been gathering...?" He prodded.

She ignored his question. "I'll teach you to follow, if you teach me how to lead. We can..." The barest trace of pink appeared on her cheeks. "Help each other, in a way. Helping ourselves at the same time. Do you think you can do it?"

You know Roxas. Never one to back down from a challenge. And Namine must have figured that herself -- why would she, a girl who rarely spoke, ask such a question unless she was trying to get Roxas to do something he wouldn't be doing otherwise?

"Fine, fine. Now what exactly am I doing wrong when I'm accompanying you?"

_Besides..._

_Maybe it won't be so bad working with you._

* * *

Wow. I made Namine extra-talkative :O Enjoy it while it lasts...  
Thanks a ton to everyone who reviewed/favorited~

Haha, I _just_ made the deadline for this one. Sorry my chapters are so short...I find that if I write long chapters, I stray off the plot too much. And shorter chapters are nice, because you don't have a TON of stuff to remember/review ^-^

You were going to review...right?  
I send you all Roxas-themed gift baskets.

Note: One of the songs I listen to while writing is Beethoven's Allegro...not sure if that's the song that Roxas will be playing, but it's one of my favorites.

**R E V I E W? :]**


	4. Lunch with Pence

**Lullaby  
**_Lunch With Pence_

_

* * *

_

_"We can...help each other, in a way. Helping ourselves at the same time. Do you think you can do it?"_

Roxas' eyes snapped open; blinking quickly as the events of the past few days sunk in. _Man_, did his teacher have it in for him. With a little frustrated groan, Roxas slid out of his navy blue bed-sheets, and sloped into the bathroom. His shoulder muscles ached (a sign he had been practicing more than usual), and as he stretched forward, his back almost cracked. Looking in the mirror, tired eyes gazed emptily back at him. Roxas yawned again, flicking the cold water on, and splashing his face mechanically.

Hayner's bed was empty, and his shoes were gone; so he figured his roommate had already left for breakfast. Or lunch. It was almost one in the afternoon, or so the clock told him. Roxas loved sleeping in late, even though it didn't seem to make him feel any less tired in the morning. It didn't matter if he got eleven hours or three -- he had to drag himself around no matter what. When he had lived at home, his mother had (at times) resorted dumping a glass of water over his head to wake him up in time for school.

After a quick and speedy late morning routine, Roxas was making his way towards one of the smaller, less crowded food areas. Aside from the hunger pains, he had this weird urge to tell someone about Namine -- how she had given her solo to him, even though it could very well be her ticket to Radiant. Or her interesting outlook on 'following' someone musically. He never had it explained to him in such a way. He had always viewed it as a more methodical practice. _Pitch in at the right times. Don't get lost. _

Hayner was out of the question. His friend often had the habit of accidentally blurting out that type of thing to_ anyone_ he spoke to. Olette...well, talking to a girl about it would just be weird. He felt foolish enough already - not to mention he didn't know her that well. Only through Hayner.

Roxas was still deep in thought when his shoulder clipped another person's as he rounded a corner. He looked up out of his stupor in surprise -- but it was none other then Pence. He was one of Roxas' closer friends (the dark haired heavy-set boy was also a flute player, and was ranked around fifteenth in the school).

"Oh, hey Roxas." Pence said brightly, rubbing his shoulder, almost grinning. "Sorry to bump into you like that."

"No problem - I wasn't looking where I was going. Have you already eaten?"

Pence shook his head. "Nope. My mom sent me some food yesterday, so I figured I'd eat it before it went bad-..." He noticed the ravenous look in his friends' eyes, and crossed his arms. "You can have some, if you want."

He didn't have to ask twice. With a good-natured smile, Roxas cheered. "Sounds good, buddy." The thought of a nice home-cooked meal temporarily pushing Namine to the farthest corner of his mind.

* * *

"Yum." Roxas sighed, inhaling the savory scent pouring off of the plate he had balanced on his lap. Pence was in a single room, and the space where a small table_ usually_ sat had been replaced by what looked to be a rather large cello case. The two boys dug in eagerly, devouring at least half the mounds of food before coming up for air.

"Who's cello is that?" Roxas finally asked, wiping his mouth with a paper napkin.

"Oh -- some guy's room was flooded by a faulty shower. He's staying in someone else's room, but there wasn't anywhere to put that thing. He picks it up every morning."

It was only when they were polishing off their second helpings when Roxas told Pence about the concert, and how the teacher had gotten Namine to somewhat 'tutor' him. His friend nodded in understanding; lips twitching in thought. Roxas wondered why he hadn't thought of telling Pence in the first place - he and Namine had actually shared a few short conversations before. So if anyone knew anything about the fair-haired girl, it would (hopefully) be Pence.

"Mhm...how did the first one go?"

"Okay. A bit awkward, I guess."

Pence contemplated his empty plate for a moment. "You like her?"

"Well, not like _like _her. Namine is just...a nice girl. I've never talked to her much, so it was sort of...weird, I guess. But not bad."

Pence looked up at him curiously. "Funny how you two have never talked, in a way. I mean - aren't you friends with with most of the other people in your class?"

Roxas shrugged. "I wouldn't say 'friends', but yeah, I talk to them once in a while. In those two hours, Namine spoke more then I usually hear from her in two _weeks_ of classes."

Pence merely nodded, grinning slightly as they both patted their full stomachs. Roxas sighed in relief -- it felt oddly _good_ to talk to someone about his long encounter with the quiet violinist. And, unlike Hayner, Pence wasn't filling in the blanks with taunts and explicit terms that even had himself shuddering.

"I've seen Namine around the courtyard a few times." Pence brought Roxas back to the surface. "She always stops and stares into the fountain - you know, the one off to the side. Old thing. Anyway, she'll just stand there for about two minutes straight, then walk off like it never happened."

"Really?" Roxas tilted his chin upwards, staring at the ceiling. "Weird." (For some reason, whenever he talked about Namine, the word 'weird' popped up more then usual).

Pence steered the conversation in another direction abruptly. "Is it hard for you now that she's concertmaster...er, mistress?"

This caught Roxas' attention. "Whaddaya mean? She deserves it -- she earned it, anyway."

"Well, think about it. You, after all this time in first, are suddenly Principal Second. Namine gets the chance to do her first concert as concertmaster, but hands it over to you instead. Ever thought that maybe...she wants you to get you a second chance?"

Roxas shrugged it off, glancing down at his empty plate. "Why would she do that? She doesn't owe me anything."

"I know." Pence amended. "And it's most likely to negatively impact her life, in more ways then one -- Namine's mom is an absolute beast! And I don't mean that in a good way, either. That woman is so set on Namine making it to Radiant, or better, that she doesn't really think 'bout much else. A child prodigy sort of mom."

"..." Roxas tried to digest all he had been told. And he was still mulling it over when he was walking back to his room. He had never thought about how much pressure Namine would be under now - she had finally beaten him, and people were probably depending on her staying there. He had merely assumed it would be no hassle; yet at every concert, even if the mistakes were minor...if one other student managed to top her, she could be bumped down. And it wasn't like Roxas had never felt that pressure...but he had been in an_ entirely_ different situation.

Roxas knew he had wonderful parents -- they weren't ever trying to create some sort of prodigy, or 'talent kid'. They were proud of him for doing the best he could.

He slowed to a stop when he was crossing the Courtyard. Roxas had never noticed the fountain before -- so now he looked. It took a few moments of casual searching. And when he found it, his mouth twisted to the side in an uncertain smile. It definitely wasn't the prettiest thing; the water needed to be filtered, and a good scrubbing wouldn't hurt. And it was old, that was for sure. But he could see that, at one point, it must have held a certain charm. The carvings winding around the top were pretty, anyway.

For some reason, he could see why Namine liked it. Roxas turned away from the cracked stone, and started back towards his room.

It was only two in the afternoon. He had a couple hours to kill; he thumbed through the thick novel he had been reading for the past few weeks. He started in on the ninth chapter eagerly, chewing on his lip as he started the first sentence. But when he read, the print remained empty. The words didn't bring any meaning to his mind. He read the same thing twice, trying to get them to make some sort of imprint in his mind. After a few minutes of similar acts, he set it aside, looking up the ceiling in frustration.

It was easy to figure out why he couldn't concentrate on his book. He was too busy brooding over his session with Namine. Why in the world had he agreed to 'work harder' so instantaneously? Not even asking for some time to think it over? What had he gotten himself into? ...Was getting into Radiant that important to him?

Well, at least he knew the answer to that one.

No. _Of course not._

Radiant wasn't a school that particularly..._ called _to him. It had an amazing reputation, and one could go very far after attending. Not to mention one year of training there is like three years anywhere else. But, still...

It was tucked away in a far corner of another place entirely. Hallow Bastion. Roxas had always tried to keep the distance between himself and his family as small as possible. The cost of him going to the academy had been trying enough -- but to send him _that far?_ And they would never be able to attend any recitals, because of expenses.

Even though he told Hayner and others that he just didn't _want_ to go to Radiant (manly pride and all that) - he really just hated putting that kind of strain on his family.

Roxas knew that if he had gotten the scholarship, it would have covered the bulk of his own personal costs. He had tried for it only for his own selfish reasons -- fame, and the longing to learn under the great musicians that taught at the famous school.

And Namine. Namine, who deserved the scholarship _so much more _then he did.

But Roxas hadn't thought of any of that until he was stumbling onto the stage, blinking in the bright lights. So what did he do? On the fourth note, he made it too sharp. All throughout the song, he threw in little imperfections. If he was performing in front of a regular audience, they might not have noticed the difference. But the four stern-looking people sitting behind the table in front of him, analyzing his every move, would. And when it came to his solo, he made his fingers fumble over everything he could think of. Just enough to move him down into second, below someone who would actually thrive in first violin.

Yes. He had never told anyone, but that 'mortifying' moment where he had a 'nervous breakdown' was all an act. He hadn't realized how much he had regretted trying for such a _privilege _until it was too late.

And, now, here he was. Doing it all over again.

* * *

First, I'm so so sorry for the long delay -- my younger sister was in the hospital for a while due to asthma, so I didn't really feel comfortable writing fluff :) But she's doing well now, so I'm free to write!

BANG! Big leap in this chapter. Now we know why Roxas is so upset all the time ;D  
Maybe a certain someone can cheer him up?

Talk to you guys in a week, hopefully!  
(Thanks for all the reviews~ :3)


	5. Fountain Visit

**Lullaby  
Fountain Visit **

* * *

Roxas thought long and hard about the current situation. He hadn't exactly _given up _his chance at a scholarship. He just had found Namine to be a more fitting candidate -- and it was almost too easy for him to slide out of the way. He didn't know if he should call that act cowardly or noble. It benefitted Namine, but it was really for himself.

The next tutoring session between Namine and Roxas wasn't quite as awkward as the first one.

_Quite _being the key word here.

Roxas made it to the classroom on time, and like the previous day, Namine was already there, her fingers just hovering over the keys of the piano. The milky paleness of her skin looked quite interesting, against the stark ivory of the piano. She didn't notice his entrance; but she didn't make a move to actually press down on a key.

The boy took a halted moment in the doorway to stop and appreciate how the sun made her hair look particularly shiny and golden. He himself had overlooked his usual attempts to flatten his hair that morning, so it was even more disheveled than usual. She never had a hair out of place, but she still managed to not come off as snobby or proud...though she wasn't exactly humble. It was almost bizarre, how _neutral _she was.

Even how she projected herself -- she didn't act like most girls her age. Though one could suppose that a child performing in front of hundreds by the age of ten could do that to a person. Roxas vaguely wondered what her reaction would be if he mussed her hair until it was just as messy as his. Namine looked up as that particular thought crossed his mind, and Roxas didn't even process that she had caught him staring until her cheeks steadily turned pink, confusion disturbing the peaceful quality that had captured her expression.

Roxas swiped at his hair; uneasily pulling on one of his spikes as he made his way towards her. He had never seen her blush - did this mean she was becoming _more _comfortable with him, or _less? _Hopefully she was becoming more comfortable, because then it would...it would mean...would mean...would mean what?

_Now where did that come from? _Roxas tried to keep his embarrassed wince to a minimum as he set his case on a small table off to the side.

"H-Hi Namine." He greeted, tipping his head forward. She inclined her own head like he had, ghost of the smallest of smiles hovering at the edge of her lips. He exhaled slowly, riveting his eyes back to the zipper of his black violin case.

"So. What will we be doing today?" He tried to sound realized.

"To warm up, I thought we could try some Mozart." The papers were slipped onto his music stand. Once again, the two played. As Namine instructed, Roxas tried not to just play the music at the same time…but actually _add _to the other person's composition. She made him pause for a few moments again and again. Repeating one line so many times, his head pounded.

And, apparently, he did okay all-in-all. Namine looked quite pleased as they packed up two hours later. As well as the practice went, Roxas couldn't wait to get back to his room, and dive head-first into his bed. He was exhausted.

Saying their goodbyes, Roxas waved one last time, before walking down the hallway. Namine informed him that she would be staying a few minutes longer, to practice her piano.

_How she does it, I'll never know._

_

* * *

_

"You seem...down." Hayner said slowly, motioning towards Roxas' dim expression.

"Yeah...I'm sort of regretting...well, Vexen's fault, s'ppose...though...all over again..." Roxas mumbled, his eyelids slowly closing.

Hayner nudged his friend's shoulder, raising an eyebrow. "Uh. Roxas? You okay?"

"Refusing...prodigy..."

Hayner laughed nervously, hand reaching forward to hit Roxas over the head (he was starting to scare him), but withdrew it shakily when the boy slumped forward. His head dropped onto his plate of rice; the sticky substance getting caught in his hair. His breathing slowed until it was quite obvious he had fallen asleep. Hayner shrugged, and continued digging into his dinner.

Hayner looked up in time to spot a rather familiar head of brown hair. His mood lightened considerably, and he called out to her across the cafeteria.

"Olette! Yo! Olette!"

Her green eyes fastened onto his - a surprised smile breaking across her features. In another few seconds, she was standing at the end of the table, grinning at Roxas snoozing in his food.

"Hi Hayner!" She paused, blinking confusedly. "Um, aren't you gonna wake him up?"

"Nope." Hayner smirked. "Revenge for making me fear for his sanity a few minutes ago. Wanna go do something?"

"Oh. Okay. Sure."

Hayner picked up his tray, and dumped the few remains in the trash before following Olette out of the cafeteria. Roxas received quite a few pointed stares, and muffled laughter for the next twenty minutes. He only awoke when he inhaled a grain of rice, and he sat up with a start. He cautiously felt at the rice and vegetables stuck in his hair, and wiped at his cheek.

He glared at a group of fellow students, before stalking out of the cafeteria. Incidentally, he hadn't eaten much of his food (once you've fallen asleep in it, it kinda loses its appeal), and his stomach was already bothering him by the time his feet hit the cobbled stones of the courtyard. The sky was orange with streaks of pink and red, and Roxas kept his eyes half-trained on the pretty sight. That's how he almost missed the sight of a blond girl staring into the fountain.

Roxas' feet came to a stop, and his jammed his fists into his jacket pockets. _Can't say I don't believe Pence now._ Namine looked like she was in a completely different world. Her long bangs kept blowing into her eyes; thin fingers would lift and brush them away to only have the cycle start over again. Her blue eyes were far away - like her body was just an empty shell while she drifted along.

"Namine?" Roxas walked up behind her, reaching to tap her on the shoulder. She finally came back down to earth, taking a step back as she noticed Roxas' outstretched arm. He let it drop back to his side sheepishly, and scratched his chin as he spoke.

"So. Um. What are you doing?"

_"-Anyway, she'll just stand there for about two minutes straight, then walk off like it never happened."_

Namine seemed to contemplate Roxas for a moment, before glancing back down at her worn shoes. "Nothing."

Roxas accepted the one-word explanation (not that you could really call it that). Then backtracked in his thoughts - her _worn _shoes? How could that be? Namine was extremely neat - if not the neatest person Roxas knew - but her clothes never had one smear of dirt, or a faded grass stain. But her shoes were a dusty mess! Roxas usually didn't pay much attention to details, but...

This was just different.

The silence between them still seemed stifled. Namine peeked up at him from beneath her eyelashes, one eyebrow quirking slightly.

"You have cauliflower in your hair."

Roxas wordlessly reached up, feeling through a few spikes, ears heating up.

Namine mumbled her goodbye, and quickly walked out of the courtyard. Maybe it wasn't 'this' that was different.

It was _her _who was different.

* * *

Slight filler chapter here. Sorry. After taking such a long break, it's really hard to remember where I was going with this :S gahhhh.


End file.
